Why Men are Happier

man-on-couch.jpgI received a forward just lately that I thorougly enjoyed, until I realized why it is true. It is not that I don’t find it humorous still, but there is a reality that was impressed upon me as I thought about it later. Here it is . . .

Men Are Just Happier People– What do you expect from such simple creatures?

  • Your last name stays put.
  • The garage is all yours.
  • Wedding plans take care of themselves.
  • Chocolate is just another snack.
  • You can be President.
  • You can never be pregnant.
  • Car mechanics tell you the truth.
  • You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky.
  • You don’t have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt.
  • Same work, more pay.
  • Wrinkles add character.
  • Wedding dress $5000 — Tux rental-$100.
  • The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected.
  • New shoes don’t cut, blister, or mangle your feet.
  • One mood all the time.
  • Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat.
  • You know stuff about tanks and guns.
  • A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase.
  • You can open all your own jars.
  • You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.
  • If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend.
  • Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack.
  • Three pairs of shoes are more than enough.
  • You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.
  • Everything on your face stays its original color.
  • The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades.
  • You only have to shave your face and neck.
  • You can play with toys all your life.
  • Your belly usually hides your big hips.
  • One wallet and one pair of shoes — one color for all seasons.
  • You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.
  • You can ‘do’ your nails with a pocket knife.
  • You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache.
  • You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives in 25 minutes on December 24th.

No wonder men are happier.

As a whole I was humored by them. There are some I disagree with, such as car mechanics don’t lie to men and men know stuff about guns and tanks. As well, we can see in our current presidential race that a women may be president.

As I thought through some of the other ones, one particular one jumped out at me, “you get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness.” This is probably true, but ought not be. In essence this statement assumes the selfishness of men. In the home, it appears that men have delegated all the household responsibilities to their wives. That way if they ever help around the house they are doing their wife a favor. As I thought about it, I thought it sad that if I ever do something my wife always does; I would be considered thoughtful. I should think that if we only help our wives rarely, we should be considered extremely selfish.

A man once told me, “I don’t ask her to change the oil, and she doesn’t ask me to do the dishes.” While I was humored by the statement, I found it a bit ridiculous. His wife does the dishes multiple times a day, and he changes the oil twice a year; and somehow those are equal responsibilities.

While I am happy about my belly hiding my hips, my haircut being in style for a decade, the inability to be pregnant, the freedom to grow a mustache, and the ability to quickly overlook and forgive . . . I am not happy that I get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. The fact that this is true only encourages the selfishness already innate in men.

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